I just booked my flight to South Africa for World Cup 2010. I’m going with my friends Andy and Katie and we have tickets for all three USA group stage games, plus a the Spain vs. Switzerland group stage match. Everyone I talk to says something along the lines of “oh wow, you must be rich to be able to go to the World Cup.” When I talk about some of the other places I’ve been, people are even more shocked.
Although I am very lucky that I do not have any student loan debt and had a business where I made some money, I am not rich. The reason I can afford to travel is that I value experiences over physical things. Let me explain.
I value experiences like traveling, going to sporting events, eating good food and learning new skills. I don’t value physical things like the latest tech gadgets, new cars, expensive houses, fashion and other material things. That’s why I’ve traveled to Europe multiple times and am going to South Africa this summer.
I’m able to travel because I drive a scratched and dented ’95 Toyota Carolla (link isn’t my car, its too clean). It is one of the cheapest cars to drive and maintain and my insurance is cheap because I don’t have comprehensive insurance, just collision. I get 30 MPG and live close to my office, so I rarely drive.
I could afford to upgrade to a “better” car, but what’s the use? I view a car as a way to get from point A to point B. As long as the car is safe and reliable, why change? I look at it this way: I could have a new car or a trip to Europe each year. The average US car payment is $400, or $4800 per year. I’ll choose driving a “crappy” car every single day of the week if it means I can go to Europe once per year.
I also don’t need luxury living. I pay $400/month to rent a room in a house that I share with 4 friends. We have an entire house here in Madison and have plenty of space. We have a great location, close to the Capitol, restaurants and bars. I could live on my own for $700 or live with a roommate in a nicer apartment for anywhere between 600-1200/month. That $200/month minimum difference in rent, or $2400, will more than pay for my flight to South Africa this summer. It could also pay for my groceries, since I cook most days of the week.
I also have had the same cell phone for the past 6 years. It’s functional, makes calls and I’ve had fewer than 10 dropped calls in that time period, unless I’m in an elevator. Since I’ve had the phone for so long, I don’t have a long term contract and my rates are low. I recently got an iPhone for business and the price difference is stunning. My old phone costs about $40/month. If this weren’t for business, a new iPhone can cost up to $100/month.
I don’t care about fashion. Obviously, I want to look good, just like everyone else, but I don’t need to be on the cutting edge. If I find something that fits and looks decent, I’ll wear it until its worn out. I own (and wear) shoes from 2004, 2008 and 2009 that still are comfortable and look decent. If you see me around Madison, you’ll probably see me in one of 5-6 different clothing combos. I spent under $200 on new clothes in 2009. I have friends who spend $200 on a single pair of jeans. That savings will pay for my match tickets to 4 world cup games and my food while I’m there.
I also try to pack a lunch instead of going out to lunch. A nice sandwich, salad and piece of fruit costs about $2 at most. The average lunch at a sandwich shop costs $7. That $5 per day difference goes toward eating dinners at interesting restaurants and trying new cuisines.
I don’t impulse buy. I never buy cheap, plastic things that will only be used once. I was talking with my friend Andy about buying things when we were on our way back from visiting our friends Mike and Pat in Chicago.
Andy said he remembered sitting in an intro Finance class sophomore year of college where the professor said “we all buy things everyday.” She was trying to give an introduction to finance, but Andy couldn’t stop thinking to himself “No, I don’t buy things everyday. Sometimes i even go 3-4 days without buying anything.” I’m in the same boat.
In the US, you can say “we buy things everyday” and for most people, it is true. I know when my parents were growing up, their families did not buy things everyday. They bought a weeks worth of groceries at the store and cooked meals at home. Eating at restaurants was rare and fast food places like Qdoba, Potbelly, Subway and others were nonexistent. Going out was considered a special treat. They wouldn’t buy candy from vending machines, cheap plastic junk from stores or close to 75% of the inventory in your typical Walmart. It’s amazing that there can be stores in the US that only sell cheap plastic junk that will only be used once. At least Walmart sells groceries and other necessities. People buy all sorts of things without even thinking about them and many times, rarely use them more than once, if at all.
I think there are three subsets of people. People who value experiences over things, people who value experiences over things, but get sucked into buying lots of material things and people who value things over experiences. I don’t think there is a “right” way to live, although I personally can’t imagine being happy based on purchasing electronics, cars and clothes; everyone can be happy in any of the three categories. The point of this post is not to chastise people who value things over experiences, but to point out that people in the middle group can get out of the “things” trap. Instead of spending money on things to “keep up with the Joneses” they could save the money and actually do the things they’ve always wanted to.
What do you think? Which category to you fit into? What experiences would you like to be able to do in your life?
19 Comments
Nathan, my sentiments exactly. I value experience but it is also nice to have nice things. I think it’s one of those things to have a good balance.
For example, I think your living expense is great, but like other things, will it last forever? Esp when you have a family, kids, etc.
Expenses reflect our priorities, and priorities change because people change – they grow up.
I believe there is a lifetime balance between experience and things. Richer experiences can be had when we are younger, youthful, and capable of traveling the world. More money should be allocated to travel and retirement in our younger years – 25-45. As we get middle aged and are culturally distinct and defined then we can begin transitioning to family and things. Basically there is a trade from general experience of the world to specific experience of family – 35-55. Travel experience costs money and so does family experience, relationships etc. In our older age, I think we can focus wholeheartedly on things – 55-75. If we have taken appropriate preventative measures and stayed in shape our whole lives then we probably will be fairly capable, but not want to travel and perhaps have a grand kid or 2 to entertain, children to continue mentoring, and things to enjoy. In a nutshell, youth is about travel and experience – you will not want to do it when you are old. When you are old you want to view memory albums of your adventurous, exciting younger years – well looking around you at the incredible luxury of things you have obtained. Both can and should be had – its just that the best “balance” occurs over time.
This is one of the best comments I’ve ever gotten on my blog. Thank you for posting.
Nathan, my sentiments exactly. I value experience but it is also nice to have nice things. I think it’s one of those things to have a good balance.
For example, I think your living expense is great, but like other things, will it last forever? Esp when you have a family, kids, etc.
Expenses reflect our priorities, and priorities change because people change – they grow up.
@Thanh Lu – I agree with you that I’ll have to spend more once I have a family, but I think the core values can stay. Yes, I’ll have to spend more money, but I know I’ll be able to save by not getting caught up in needing to have the cutting edge gadget or a nice new car.
@Thanh Lu – I agree with you that I’ll have to spend more once I have a family, but I think the core values can stay. Yes, I’ll have to spend more money, but I know I’ll be able to save by not getting caught up in needing to have the cutting edge gadget or a nice new car.
Great post and one that I think people especially in Category 2 should reflect on. My vote? Experiences, experiences, experiences.
Sadly, category 3 and sometimes 2, view purchasing as an experience. I’ve never understood that; it’s as if you are living an experience marketed with a certain car, jeans, etc. Talk about extending the experience.
You’ve also introduced the form vs function argument, but you’ve given it a twist. My dad was a research chemist. He was a function guy – probably shoes and shirts as old as yours. But where you are different is that you are consciously choosing function in order to “purchase” an experience.
IMHO my life should be a series of experiences – each of which pushes, pulls, shapes me. Life should be about being alive, not sleepwalking through the process in my designer clothes.
@georgeju @groupstory
George, great response.
I think it is easier to buy into the function side of the argument if you have a concrete goal. My friend Beata is traveling the world (read her guest posts in my travel section) and found it easier to not spend on clothes and shoes when she had a concrete goal. I think she told me once “Nate, I stopped buying expensive dresses because one new dress costs me five days of hotels and food in Egpyt.” At the time, she was living in London and was planning a 2 week trip to Egypt. Having that concrete goal makes you view purchases in a completely different light and makes it much easier to be happy with purely functional things.
Great post and one that I think people especially in Category 2 should reflect on. My vote? Experiences, experiences, experiences.
Sadly, category 3 and sometimes 2, view purchasing as an experience. I’ve never understood that; it’s as if you are living an experience marketed with a certain car, jeans, etc. Talk about extending the experience.
You’ve also introduced the form vs function argument, but you’ve given it a twist. My dad was a research chemist. He was a function guy – probably shoes and shirts as old as yours. But where you are different is that you are consciously choosing function in order to “purchase” an experience.
IMHO my life should be a series of experiences – each of which pushes, pulls, shapes me. Life should be about being alive, not sleepwalking through the process in my designer clothes.
@georgeju @groupstory
George, great response.
I think it is easier to buy into the function side of the argument if you have a concrete goal. My friend Beata is traveling the world (read her guest posts in my travel section) and found it easier to not spend on clothes and shoes when she had a concrete goal. I think she told me once “Nate, I stopped buying expensive dresses because one new dress costs me five days of hotels and food in Egpyt.” At the time, she was living in London and was planning a 2 week trip to Egypt. Having that concrete goal makes you view purchases in a completely different light and makes it much easier to be happy with purely functional things.
travel is not for everyone
travel is not for everyone
No, travel is not for everyone, but the point still stands. Travel is just one kind of experience, there are many others that you can experience right in your home town.
No, travel is not for everyone, but the point still stands. Travel is just one kind of experience, there are many others that you can experience right in your home town.
I’ve traveled a lot and gained a lot of experiences. Unlike many people who live in northern hemisphere countries and live cheapily to travel far and wide, my experiences have been mostly of survival and pursuing of dreams and realizations in spite of the adversities. I’ve had to learn to live cheaply in order to be able to move looking for better opportunities, many times getting away from bad events and experiences.
Yes, I do drive a rusty Toyota Corolla too. An ’88 model to be more exact, an amazing vehicle which took me from west to east coasts in North America twice. Would I buy a brand new vehicle? Not really. I cannot afford it.
In my personal experience I’ve learned about the value of certain things. And I’m going to be heretic in saying that sometimes I value certain things more than people. Some people may be kind, helpful and honest. They are true jewels which are getting harder to find – the experience of having a true friend. The majority of people hurt, change, backstab and betray and will run away and dissapear in moments when we need help. In contrast if we own a good thing which we always took care of, if we flick up its switch it mostly will turn on and will be there to help us even if it’s after 40 years.
Now before I get slandered let me explain that I do have a little family who I love immensely and I’m loved by them. They are my spiritual existence and fortress. The material appreciation I have is not towards consumerism, but the awareness of the value of things built in a way that go beyond exceeding its “lifetime”, and that from the point of view of “business” and the “economy” they are betrayals as they stop people who can see beyond the scheme to continue buying newer items simply because they’re “old”.
One detail that north americans have ingrained in their brains is the belief that goods are available as “for granted” therefore it is not necessary to take care of them. So many good items, manufactured in times when quality and materials were better have been thrown to the garbage. Take for instance the rusty Corolla: Can you imagine the amount of resources and materials it has saved from consumption in almost 25 years? Can you imagine the joy and beauty of this car if it would have been taken care of from the first day it rolled off the dealership and not being abused by previous unscrupulous owners who did not value it at all?
This vehicle is a hero because it survived. And it happily starts every morning, even while its dark fate is written and God only knows for how long its body will last before it turns into dust. This car is something I can count on with more reliability – if I had an emergency, chances that it will be available for me to get help are greater than asking for help to people.
Think about it. Think before you buy something new. And take utmost care of all your things. You never know when you will need them.