Apologizing

We’ve all hurt others, sometimes intentionally, sometimes unintentionally.  We’ve all screwed up before, whether it was at work, at home or with friends.  Nobody is perfect.  It’s part of being human.  We’ve also all apologized when we’ve done something wrong.  Part of living in a civilized society is admitting you were wrong.

There are two ways to apologize.  One type of apology makes you feel better about yourself and is really just a token apology.  For instance “I’m sorry you feel that way” is a fake apology.  The other type of apology is where you take responsibility for your actions, let the person know you were in the wrong and attempt to make it right.  The latter is a true apology.  It’s “I’m sorry for insulting you, I should never have called you that.  I lost my temper and it won’t happen again” instead of “I’m sorry you took my comment that way.”

It seems to me that there are too many apologies these days that aren’t really apologies.  People apologize to feel better about themselves and refuse to take any real responsibility.  I’d like to see that change.  When you screw up, I urge you to apologize for real, to make the other person feel better and make the situation right, rather than use a lame, cop out apology to make yourself feel better.  People will respect you more if you are willing to admit when you were wrong and then take responsibility for your actions.

Although it’s best to apologize as soon as you know you’ve hurt someone else, it’s never too late to apologize or change your fake apology for a real one.  Take a look in the mirror and see if there is anyone who you owe an apology.  If there is, call or email them tomorrow and start to make things right.

Why Doesn’t US Soccer Produce Homegrown Strikers?

Soccer has been gaining popularity in the US ever since World Cup 1994.  Soccer is the most played youth sport in the US.  The MLS now averages over 17,100 fans per game, about the same as the NBA and NHL.  Seattle’s average attendance is now 36,350 “and would have ranked ninth in the English Premier League, sixth in Spain’s La Liga, second in France’s Ligue 1 and fourth in Italy’s Serie A.” The national team has made some great progress and has started to get better results, advancing to the quarterfinals in 2002 and winning the group in 2010, plus 2nd place in 2009 confederations cup and a win over Spain.  But what’s holding the US national team back?  The most glaring deficiency is a world class striker.

There has never been a truly great US striker.  The closest is Brian McBride, a great player, but not truly world class.  The US has produced tons of world class goalkeepers (Casey Keller, Tim Howard, Brad Friedal, Tony Meola), a few midfielders (Claudio Reyna, Landon Donovan, Clint Dempsey) and good defenders (Alexi Lalas), but no strikers.

It’s maddening to watch many US games.  They have a decent buildup, good passing, but then the finish is just lacking.  In the US’s 2-0 win against Jamaica today, a real world class striker would have scored at least 4-5 more times.  It happens time and time again.   The US team is as or more athletic than any team in the world.  It has a good midfield, an amazing goalkeeper and a decent defense.  The biggest thing missing is a world class striker.

The US has not produced a striker with a nose for goal in the mold of Messi, Rooney, Torres, Teves, Drogba, Eto’o or even a Berbatov.  The last goal by a US striker in a World Cup was scored by Brian McBride on June 17 2002 in a 2-0 round of 16 win vs Mexico.   Since then, all 8 goals have been scored by midfielders.  Charlie Davis could have been that forward, be he almost died in a car crash and is still not back in form 2 years later.  Jozy Altidore shows flashes, but does not seem to have that killer, striker instinct.

So why is this?  I’ve been playing my whole life and reffing for 12 years now and i have a few theories.

When we start playing in organized leagues at age 4 or 5, the rest of the world is still playing in the park.  We play way too many full sided games way too early, don’t practice enough or play enough pickup games.  Even when kids are 4 or 5, the point of games is far too often to get a win, not to develop your skills.  We are always playing on grass, while the rest of the world grows up playing on pavement, tennis courts, gravel, dirt or artificial surfaces.  When young players in the rest of the world move to grass, the ball moves slow and they can do anything.  We have too many coaches who stifle our imagination with tactics that work when we are young, at the expense of true technical quality.

The other issue is sportsmanship.  When a striker scores a ton in an organized league, the coach takes him out, or puts him in on defense or midfield and tells him not to run up the score.  In other countries, the goal scorer keeps on scoring in pickup games.  He’s picked first when people are choosing teams.  An example.  When I was 10, I played on a team with a bunch of my friends.  We were really good and rarely lost.  My friend Jeremy and I were the leading goal scorers.  Every time we got up by a few goals, our coaches would put both of us on defense, or as the goalkeeper.  Obviously, neither of us had the talent to be an international, but imagine the true top players in the US who are stopped from scoring at a young age.  It kills their killer instinct that strikers need.

So how do we fix it?  If i were in charge of youth soccer in the US, here’s what I’d do.

1.  Don’t start with organized soccer until kids are older.  Instead, get kids together and have them play semi organized pickup games.  At the end of the “season” break kids into teams for a quick 2-3 week season to get them used to playing on a real field.  Scale back coaching.  They mostly stifle creativity.

2. Force young kids to practice on tennis courts, dirt and other artificial surfaces.  These surfaces are way faster, so when you go onto grass, everything is slow and you have amazing touch.  The typical soccer moms will hate this.

3. Get rid of the sportsmanship excuse.  Have less of a focus on winning and losing when kids are young and let a great goal scorer keep scoring to keep developing their skills.

Hey Entrepreneurs! You Need To Talk About Your Ideas!

When I was in Chile, most of the Chilean entrepreneurs were afraid to talk about their ideas.  They would say “I’m working on a project in technology” or “I have an Internet startup that I think can change the world.”  I’m seeing the same problem in Madison, especially with young or first time entrepreneurs.  It’s a huge problem in places that would like to become startup hotbeds.  People are afraid to talk about their startup ideas, mainly because they think people will steal their ideas.

In the Valley, NYC, Boulder, Austin and other startup hotbeds, everyone talks openly about their startups.  It’s how you test your ideas and get feedback.  I can’t count the number of times I’ve gotten great from other entrepreneurs.  Or the times times someone has said “oh, that’s an awesome idea, you need to meet so and so” or “I’m a reporter for (insert publication), I’d love to cover your story.” or “I’m a programmer/biz dev/sales specialist and I’d love to work for you” or “you should partner with (insert company).”

I met the guys who acquired my first business, my first programmer, my attorney/mentor, my current business partner Jesse, got countless press interviews and tons of other connections just by talking to people.  Entrustet would be nowhere near what it is today if we refused to talk about it for our first year and a half until we were fully launched.

These connections and conversations ARE the ecosystem that people talk about.  If all of the startups in Silicon Valley suddenly stopped talking to each other, deal flow, partnerships and innovation would stop.  You need to make ideas run into each other for innovation to happen.  You need other smart people giving you feedback if you want to succeed.

So what are you scared of?  Do you think some other entrepreneur is going to steal your idea?  Do you think your idea is so special it can’t see the light of day?  I don’t remember which startup guru said it, but if your idea is 1 in a million, 3oo other people in the us are working on it.  For my Chilean readers, that means 16 other people in Chile are working on it!  Entrepreneurship is all execution, not the your idea.  As my friends at Planet Propaganda like to say, “I’d rather have a ham sandwich than just a good idea, you can at least eat the sandwich!”

If you think you wont be able to succeed because someone else knows a little bit about your idea, you probably shouldn’t be starting your business.  You need to out execute everyone.  You can’t be scared of someone copying your idea.  You need to get feedback and make connections.  The only way to do this is to talk to people!

Entrepreneurs who are already working on their own companies are the least likely people to steal your ideas and they are the most likely to give you actionable, valuable feedback that will help your business grow, or connect you with a partner or investor your need to grow your business.  The tiny risk that someone will steal your idea pales in comparison to the huge benefits you can get in feedback, advice, press and partnerships.   Entrepreneurs, for the most part, want to help other entrepreneurs.  They are smart and think like you.  What better way to challenge your thinking than to have another smart person think about your ideas with you?

It’s a problem in Chile, Madison, Milwaukee and other aspiring startup hubs.  The other week, I talked to a 20 year old UW student who wouldn’t tell me more than he was into “green technology.”  I can’t help you if you don’t tell me more!  Moral of the story: it pays to talk about your ideas!

Travelogue: Pucón and Lakes Region

My parents came to visit me in Chile at the end of April and we decided to go to Pucón and the lakes region, but I got lazy in my blogging and didn’t write up this post until just now.  We started off in sunny Santiago in our tiny little Chevy Spark and took the highway south.  The weather was beautiful and we could still see the Andes to the east as we were driving out of the city.  The route south is beautiful, starting with vineyards and wine country, later turning into rolling hills and lush greenery.  A few hours south of Santiago, the sun started to set, projecting brilliant reds and pinks on the Andes.

We stopped our first night in Chillan, a medium sized town about four hours south of Santiago.  We didn’t see much since we were just staying over, but the town center looked really interesting.  The next morning, we got up early and started to drive south again.  After a few hours, we got off the main highway and drove toward a huge volcano, shrouded in clouds.  I hadn’t seen clouds many times since I’d been in Chile, so it was an interesting sight.

As we got closer, the weather started to get worse.  We drove through Villarica and it started to drizzle.  The clouds obscured the volcano.  We knew it was off season and that it might be rainy in Pucón, but we had hoped it would stay dry.  After a beautiful drive along the lake we got to Pucón, a small touristy town of about 25,000 people.  Since it was off season, we pretty much had the place to ourselves.

People had told me that the food in the south was way better than in Santiago and I was not disappointed.  The food was amazing!  We started out by sharing grilled lamb and halfway through our meal, it started to pore.  It was cold out and none of us had any rain gear in the restaurant, so I ran back to the car to drive it around.

One problem.  The car didn’t start.  I had left the lights on.  We tried a push start, but couldn’t get it to work.  I asked a police officer if he could give me a jump, he said he didn’t have cables, but taxis did.  I asked a collectivo, he said he didn’t have any cables.  I talked to four different taxis, all of whom said they couldn’t help me.  I even offered to pay.  Finally, one taxi told me that if I bought cables he would help me.  Five minutes later, I had the cables, but he had driven away.  I walked back to the car, cables in hand and luckily a nice guy stopped and agreed to help out.  After about an hour, we were on our way.  Since the battery was dead, we had to drive around for awhile, which was alright because it was raining.  This would become a recurring theme.

We stayed the night in Pucón and walked around as the clouds started to clear.  We decided to take a walk on the beach.  Just before sunset, it started to drizzle.  Luckily, that meant we got to see a rainbow.  And not just any rainbow.  A double rainbow.

Later that night, we had another amazing meal. This time we split venison stew and a wild boar dish with veggies.  It was hearty, warm and filling.  Perfect for a cool and rainy night.  The next morning, it was raining again and we planned to take a drive toward Argentina, but when I tried to start the car, it was dead.  The guy at the hotel jumped us and we decided to drive around to other towns to charge it up again.  The weather started to clear in the afternoon and we drove through a bunch of small towns and ended up in Villarica, a less touristy town 20 miles from Pucón.  We stayed above an italian restaurant, walked around the city and ate some great fish at a small restaurant.

The next morning, the car started up like a charm and we took a drive toward the Argentina border.  We drove through a bunch of smalls towns and were pretty much the only tourists.  Each town was a a little different and the weather was perfect.  Curarrehue was a hidden gem.  We walked around, checked out the Mapuche museum and then walked into a bakery called Pasteleria La Cocina de Elisa on the main plaza for a small snack.  We smelled something amazing and I asked what it was.  The baker, Elisa Cea Epuin, brought out fresh baked meat empanadas and we decided we had to have some.  They were amazing, the best I’ve had in Chile.  After we finished, she came out with the fried version.  Amazing again.  Next, we tried some bakery and check out some local canned fruits and jams.  Everything was wild picked, nothing was farmed.  After a few minutes, she emerged from the kitchen with some amazing berry spread.  The baker had been invited to London and Dublin a few years back to make all of her food at the embassy and I can see why they picked her.

After we finished, we got back to the car and what do you know? Another dead battery.  I asked a guy at the only gas station in town and he said he couldn’t help me, but there was a mechanic just down the street.  As I walked up, all the workers and truckers stopped and just sort of stared.  I don’t think they were expecting a family of tourists.   The mechanic was out to lunch, so I went back up to the gas station and sat there until someone agreed to give me a jump again.  Thankfully, this was the last time we’d need our jumper cables.

We drove through the beautiful mountain valleys, past crystal clear lakes and shaded passes under the bright sunlight.  We came to little town called Huife and decided to turn around.  As we were driving back, I saw a sign for a restaurant that was advertising fresh trout, turkey and venison, so we had to stop.  We were the only people around, besides the waitress/cook and the food was amazing.  Rich, savory and fresh.  It was a great decision to stop.

We stayed another night in Pucón and the next day, the weather was really nice and went up the volcano.  It is a huge volcano that has a history of erupting, sometimes destroying the surrounding towns.  It was cloudy in Pucón, but we emerged from the clouds into bright sunlight about halfway up the volcano.  The clouds looked like icing on a cake, covering the valley.  We took a hike up the volcano and started when it was bright and sunny.  It was amazing to see the evidence of past lava flows and the destruction it wreaked on the vegetation. About an hour later, the pea soup had descended and we couldn’t see more than a few feet in front of our faces.  Luckily, the trail was very well marked.  The fog was eerie and outlined the trees perfectly.

The next morning, we drove back to Santiago, capping a great trip to the south.  Although the weather and car trouble were less than optimal, it was an outstanding trip.  I’m really glad my parents got a chance to visit and got to spend some time sharing where I’d been living for the past six months.  I really loved the area around Pucón.  The combination of lakes, mountains, lush green scenery and amazing food is pretty hard to beat.